THE KNOT OF WORTH
“You were told you weren’t enough. So you became louder, smaller, perfect. But you were always worthy.”
Some wounds don’t scream.
They whisper.
“You’re not enough.”
“You have to earn your place.”
“You’ll be loved when…”
This is the Knot of Worth. It doesn’t always begin with cruelty. Sometimes it starts with silence—when no one noticed you were hurting. When you got praise only for performance. When your needs felt like too much.
So you became smaller to be loved. Or louder to be seen. Or perfect to feel safe.
And still, part of you wonders if you’re allowed to simply be.
​✦ What This Knot Looks Like
The Knot of Worth can wear many masks:
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Overachievement that never satisfies.
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Shrinking in groups, afraid to take up space.
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Feeling like an imposter, even when you're thriving.
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People-pleasing so no one ever pulls away.
It often shows up as anxiety around being perceived, and a lingering fear that if others really knew you, they'd leave. So you try harder. Work harder. Love harder. And still, it doesn’t fill that echo.
Because this knot isn’t about what you do.
It’s about forgetting who you are.
✦ Where It Starts
This knot often takes root in childhood—sometimes in high-pressure homes, sometimes in quiet ones where emotional needs weren’t mirrored back.
Maybe you were praised only when you performed. Maybe you were punished when you were messy, loud, or sad. Maybe no one ever said “I’m proud of you” when you weren’t doing something impressive.
Over time, your nervous system adapted. You learned to earn attention.
To only show the parts of yourself that felt lovable.
And to hide the rest.
✦ Untying the Knot
Untying this knot isn’t about finally becoming “enough.” It’s about remembering you always were.
The unraveling begins slowly:
– Letting yourself be seen when you don’t have it all together.
– Saying no, even when it disappoints someone.
– Resting without needing to earn it.
– Feeling the ache, and staying with it.
This knot unties through radical gentleness.
Not force.
Not striving.
But through the sacred practice of coming home to yourself.
You don’t need to become worthy.
You need to stop believing you weren’t.
When did you first feel like you had to earn love?
Who taught you that you had to impress to belong?
What would it feel like to simply be—and still be enough?
Reflection Prompt:
“If I didn’t have to prove anything… how would I move through the world today?”