THE KNOT OF TIME
“You were taught time was a threat—
so you rushed, froze, or dissociated.
Now you’re always running… or running out.”
This knot doesn’t just bind the past.
It bends your sense of now.
The Knot of Time forms when memory was unkind—
or survival demanded disconnection.
You learned to fear what came next,
or couldn’t trust what came before.
So you live ahead of yourself,
or behind yourself,
but rarely with yourself.
This knot whispers:
“You’re late.”
“You’ll miss it.”
“You’re stuck forever.”
“You’re already too far gone.”
But those aren’t prophecies.
They’re echoes.
And they can be rewoven.
​
The Knot of Time forms when trauma breaks the flow of life.
When something happened that never got to finish—
or something never happened that you waited for too long.
It can come from neglect or overwhelm, chaos or stillness.
From holding too much memory—or none at all.
So you float.
You grind.
You chase the future.
You mourn the past.
But you forget how to be here.
Because here… was never safe.
​✦ What This Knot Looks Like
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Feeling like your life is happening “off-beat” or delayed
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Constant sense of rushing, even when there’s no deadline
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Deep fatigue from constantly bracing for what’s next
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Dissociation or foggy memory
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Nostalgia that hurts more than it heals
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Fear of wasting time, or guilt for “doing nothing”
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Panic during stillness
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Inability to rest—even when exhausted
This knot looks like urgency.
But underneath it all?
Is grief.
✦ Where It Starts
Maybe time was weaponized in your house—countdowns, punishments, pressure.
Maybe no one ever arrived when they said they would.
Maybe everything changed too fast.
Or not fast enough.
Maybe you had to grow up before your time.
Maybe no one marked the moments that mattered.
Or maybe a moment shattered everything—and your body never left.
So you learned:
Presence = Vulnerability
Stillness = Danger
Slowness = Shame
You forgot how to be held by time.
Because time was never gentle.
✦ Untying the Knot
This knot unties when time becomes sacred again.
When the clock becomes a partner, not a threat.
It unravels when you:
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Ground yourself in the present without guilt
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Let rest be holy—not wasteful
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Recognize spirals, not straight lines
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Stop racing “ahead” and start reclaiming now
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Allow delayed dreams to breathe without shame
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Let go of the pressure to “catch up” to a version of you that never existed
You are not behind.
You’re becoming.
Time can heal.
If you let it move through you instead of past you.
When did time start to feel unsafe?
What part of me still lives in a moment I couldn’t control?
What would happen if I stopped rushing?
Reflection Prompt:
“If time were a friend—not a thief—how would I spend today?”